B.E.D.A. 2013: Spring Ice Storm

I remember several years ago when I was either in eighth or ninth grade, we had a massive ice storm around this same time.  The difference between that one and this one? The weather had been consistent leading up to the storm, and it took more than one single day for the ice to completely melt off.

Today when I got off work I decided it would be the perfect day to take my mom's fancy camera (the one that she doesn't know how to operate very well) and go photograph the odd yet very normal beauty of my surrounds that were green and in full bloom covered in ice.

The "baby" tree in the south part of our yard was hit the worst.

Our beautiful Bradford pear trees were covered in ice as well, but they were still beautiful to look at.

This is quite possibly my favorite photo.

I'm serious when I say a thick layer of ice.

I have several more storm shots from today that I uploaded to Flickr and they can be found here.

B.E.D.A. Day 10: Completed

B.E.D.A. 2013: Books Help

I didn't realize until a few months ago that I can have bad cases of anxiety.  Most often I'm stuck laying in bed at night unable to think because of my anxiety.  The solution I found, is something that I used to do a lot and I think is the main reason why I never completely realized I had so much anxiety at night: reading.

When I was in the first grade we had these reading assignments where we picked a book that wasn't very long maybe twenty pages at most.  The books varied on difficulty depending on the vocabulary used.  We would be sent home with the book and a reading card for the week that our parents had to sign every day when we read with them.  My mom, who has always been a very avid book reader for as long as I can remember would always help me read my assignments before bed.

Ever since then I would usually read before bed.  I can even recall one snow storm that had knocked out our power for a few days.  I was scared as a little kid but I remember sitting in the living room with candle on the coffee table as I read my library book.  I escaped from the fear of not having any power.

In middle school and high school I was known to always have at least one book with me. Honestly, I was like that even in grade school.  I often got in trouble for reading when I was supposed to be working on assignments.

I've always loved books, so naturally I've been used to reading at bedtime.  When I went off to college I hadn't expected that I would be too tired at the end of the day to read myself asleep, but still I would lay there and my anxiety would take over.

At the beginning of January I made a conscious promise to myself that I would pick up reading again.  I've still continued reading, but not like I used to in high school.

Now, I'm working on multiple books within a week and on some nights I've read myself asleep.  For me, reading is a hobby of sorts and a way to cope with my anxiety.

B.E.D.A. Day 9: Completed

P.S. Here's a link to my GoodRead's account.  I'm planning on reading 50 books for the year of 2013.

B.E.D.A. 2013: Top 25 on iPhone

Today I decided that I would share my top 25 most played songs on my iPhone, even though my entire music collection isn't even any where near being able to fit on my phone.  I thought it would be fun to share, seeing as I just keep the songs that I really enjoy currently and the ones that I like to listen to when I go to the gym.

1. And Run by He Is We
2. This Is the Stuff by Francesca Battistelli
3. Fall by He Is We
4. We Are Never Ever Getting Back Together Again by Taylor Swift
5. Happily Ever After by He Is We
6. Blown Away by Carrie Underwood
7. Kiss It Better by He Is We
8. I've Got Nothing by ChartJackers
9. Lutheran Swag by Agape (this was for the Evangelical Lutheran Church of America's National Youth Gathering of 2012)
10. Good Girls Go Bad (feat. Leighton Meester) by Cobra Starship
11. Springsteen by Eric Church
12. Forever and Ever by He Is We
13. All About Us by He Is We
14. Lightning by Alex Goot
15. Like a G6 by Far East Movement
16. Your Love Never Fails (feat. Chris Quilala) by Jesus Culture
17. Made In America by Toby Keith
18. Redneck Yacht Club by Craig Morgan
19. Creepin' by Eric Church
20. Drink In My Hand by Eric Church
21. Country Music Jesus by Eric Church
22. Club Can't Handle Me (feat. David Guetta) by Flo Rida
23. Prove You Wrong by He Is We
24. I Run to You by Lady Antebellum
25. Drop the World by Lil Wayne & Eminem

It took forever to find all of these on YouTube considering how slow our internet is and then add inclimate weather on top of that.

B.E.D.A. Day 8: Completed

B.E.D.A. 2013: My Opinion on Taylor Swift

I feel that because of the nature of this post, I should at least put a warning out.  WARNING: This post expresses some of my views and opinions, you don't have to agree with me.

I've had so many mixed opinions about Taylor Swift.

When I was first introduced to her music years ago when I was in middle school, I loved her so much.  She was a young country artist just trying to make it big with something she loved doing.

Slowly, over the years Swift has changed my mind about her.  Part of it is probably of me growing up and forming sound opinions about certain things. Also, that Swift herself is older and has taken certain paths in her life for her own reasons.

Today, I now can explain, or at least get the general point of why I dislike Swift at times, and at others can tolerate her.

The most recent songs of Swift that I've heard include 22, I Knew You Were Trouble and We Are Never Ever Getting Back Together Again have been on the pop radio stations that I occasionally listen to. I don't mind them, (with the exception I Knew You Were Trouble, I just can't stand listening to that one) and I often find myself singing along.

The problem: even though most of Swift's newer songs are only being played on non-country stations, she's still be heavily considered to be country.

What?

Why?

I don't mind Taylor Swift's music.  I just have a problem of branding music the wrong way when it doesn't fit the genre that it's supposedly in.

And yes, considering yesterday's post about how I view today's country music could mean that this could just be a new step for country...but I seriously don't even think we're any where near that point.

Right. Glad I've got that out of my system now.

To each their own.

B.E.D.A. Day 7: Completed

B.E.D.A. 2013: Today's Country Music

I've long since stopped listening to people who try to tell me that country music shouldn't be classified as music.  Instead I shrug my shoulders and try to keep my comments and opinions about rap music to myself.

If you're like me and grew up listening to country music you can agree with me that the genre has changed quite a bit, no matter when you started listening, to the present.  I grew up listening to a lot of classic country that my mom kept on...eight tracks, and then her collection of cds as well as the artists that were around in the late 90's and early 2000's.  Even to this day my preference is to listen to the Outlaws, or George Strait.  And I can't forget Shania Twain, who was my first cd when I was about six and my love for Shania's catchy songs on the radio made me beg for her music.

To me, today's country has a lot of rock inspired sound to it.  I at first was a little ticked off when I realized this difference but as I've listened to more and more of today's country and compared it to earlier music in the genre, there isn't that much difference between the two.  Some of the music that the Outlaws produced had some rock inspiration in it.

It's a hard thing for me to explain, especially if you don't know anything other than today's country.  I guess I'm saying that to me I'm always going to the love the classics.  That people today can't capture the stories like Patsy Cline, George Jones, Hank Williams, Johnny Cash, Jimmy Rodgers and countless others.  To me, when I think country, I think the classics, and I'm sure that's how it'll always be.

B.E.D.A. Day 6: Completed

B.E.D.A. 2013: Healthy Habits

For the last couple of months now I've focused a lot on forming new healthy habits.  It's been a rough start seeing as I've had to stop and start a few times.  It does however get easier to go a longer time before I have to stop for one reason or another, and the hiatus period is shorter each time, making it even easier to start again.

Part of the reason why I have been focusing on my health is because I realized a few months ago that between my mom and my dad's sides of the family that my brother and I are pretty much screwed when it comes to our health in the long run.  With diabetes as the number one thing that has been passed down from both sides, it's also the tamest of things all considered.  Since the realization of how screwed my brother and I are, I decided that now was the perfect time to get serious about forming new healthy habits that I want to continue with for the rest of my life.

One of the things I first started working on, and honestly I'm still battling with it now, is realizing some of the triggers to my eating.  I had started noticing a few months ago that after meals I felt stuffed, and though it wasn't make me feel ill it still gave me an icky feeling.  And then the foods that I was eating so much of at these meals weren't the best ones to be putting in my body.

I have found that portion control is the way to work on fixing this.  I normally only put a small portion of all the foods I'm eating for a meal on my plate.  I have to promise myself at the beginning of each meal to only eat what I'm hungry for, and that I don't have to completely clear my plate each meal.  In the couple of months I've been doing this I've found myself feeling content after each meal and instead of feeling stuffed or full, I feel that I am no longer hungry.

Another habit I have been getting into is buying and eating fresh fruits and vegetables as often as I can.  Now that I'm home (there's going to be a post on this soon), I've been slowly incorporating my fresh produce into the meals that I make for my parents when it's my night to cook.  I'm not very good with cooking, but learning how to cook and working on these skills are so much more fun when I try to incorporate my fresh produce.

The other large habit that I've taken up is working out at least five out of seven days a week.  Although I have been slacking on this the last couple of weeks since I've been super lazy when I get off work and don't want to go to the gym, I do try to do something will benefit my body, like stretching for fifteen minutes before bed.

It's a long journey to get to where I want to be health wise, but I'm taking it a day at a time and remembering that it took nineteen years to form the habits I have now, that it's going to take a while to form and stick with these new ones.

B.E.D.A. Day 5: Completed

B.E.D.A. 2013: In the News

When I was younger I would "read" the Wichita Eagle with my parents.  By "reading" the Eagle, I mean flipping through all the pages and looking at black and white and occasional colored photos.  Today I realized that it's much different when it comes to newspapers.

For the last several years we haven't had any newspapers delivered to our house simply because we needed to cut costs and unfortunately the newspaper subscription just had to go.  Recently, my mom started up a four day per week subscription with the Wichita Eagle and to get our local newspaper once a week.

Within the last few years I've done my fair share of reading newspaper articles for classes, projects, and even for fun.  The catch though, they've all been online.  With a few clicks of a mouse and a couple of keystrokes, I can have a newspaper on my laptop, Kindle or iPhone screen within seconds.

Now that we've got the newspapers coming directly to our house again, I've felt like something has fallen in place again.  I can sit in the morning and flip through the pages and see what's going on.  On Thursday I can read what my home town is doing with new projects coming up, and of course, check out the police beat section just to see how many dog disturbances there can possibly be in one week.

I love technology.  But reading material, whether it be books, magazines or newspapers just feels better when I have it in my hands and can physically turn the page.

B.E.D.A., Day 4: Completed

B.E.D.A. 2013: Surreal Moments

I was in Kohl's yesterday when one of my favorite songs by Alex Day came on the speaker system.  What was so crazy wasn't the fact that I started singing along without even realizing what I was doing while shopping, but that when I realized it was Alex Day's song I couldn't believe the feeling of pure happiness I felt.

(Photo Credit: Wikipedia - Forever Yours (Alex Day song))

It's not very often that I hear some of my favorite YouTuber's music being played out IRL (In Real Life), but when I do, I'm beaming with happiness.

I first got into subscribing to YouTubers who made content on a regular basis back in late 2010, early 2011 around the time I had my hip replaced.  There's not much to do that doesn't require a ton of brain power when you're on so much medicine and limited to sitting in bed for most of the day.  Among many YouTubers I found and subscribed to and still interact with in ways of internet, Alex Day is one of them and to this day I have watched every video that he's uploaded on YouTube.

Joey Graceffa and Meghan Camarena both are YouTubers and are racing on The Amazing Race.  I had to explain the YouTube thing to my parents the other night when we were watching Joey and Meghan because they didn't understand how YouTube worked.  I explained to them about how difficult it is to make new and original content for viewers and that in itself can be a full time job.

It made me realize when I was explaining this that the people I watch on YouTube have helped me personally in many ways.  Some of my favorite bands, or artists have been people from YouTube like Luke Conard, Alex Goot, Jason Munday, and Alex day (just to name a small selection).  Their music has at some point in the last couple of years made me relate to it and in turn has impacted my life in some small way.

As Luke Conard says, "music is the most powerful form of magic."

V.E.D.A., Day 3: Completed

BEDA 2013: Stuck

The last couple of days have been wonderful just because we've started to get some rain in our neck of the woods.  The grass in our front yard has suddenly become a dark green and has made me realize that I need to start mowing sooner than I had originally expected.  The wheat is starting to look healthy and full of nutrients as it's still growing.

With rain comes muddy back roads.

It's been a habit since I was a child. We've always taken the shortcut from our house west of town to the next town over where we often do our errands and grocery shopping. It's a clean shot on one road that leads us from here to there, and most often the road isn't that busy since it's been known to be one of the rougher dirt roads in the area.  About halfway the dirt turns to concrete and it's a smooth sail from there.

I can remember the first time I drove the road in my car without my parents with me.  It was wonderful to drive by myself.

It still is.

The bad part of this habit of using this road all the time is this.  You're brain doesn't fully comprehend that it shouldn't drive this road after it's been raining nearly two days straight.

I ended up getting my car stuck about a third of the way down the road after the concrete ended and the dirt/mud began.  I was doing alright until I hit a particularly soupy part of the road and lost control of the wheel for a little bit.  My car ended up in the ditch, but thankfully the part of the road was in an area that the ditch wasn't really a ditch and I basically just stopped myself by lightly running into a large mound of dirt that a farmer had put on the edge of his field as kind of a bank.

I knew that if I tried too much to get the car out that I would only dig myself deeper into the mud. I gave up with trying to move it myself pretty fast.  I called my dad, thinking that since I was only a couple of miles away he would bring his truck over and pull me out, I'd be right on my way home.

He didn't answer.

My next call was to my mom, at work where I knew she was busy.  It was around the time I thought she would be heading home and I knew her truck could make the drive to pull me out.

She didn't answer.

My next form of sending out an S.O.S.?

Sadly, no one responded to this either.

Shortly after sending my S.O.S. tweet, a man passing by stopped and asked me if I wanted him to go get his truck to come pull me out.  While waiting on him to return, another man stopped and asked if I needed help, shortly followed by two guys in a truck so large that could have pushed me out.

In the end, the guy returned with his truck and his wife and daughter with him.  The daughter of whom I had actually met when I was in high school.  They pulled me out and made sure I got to the highway alright.

My car, The Hazard will need to be taken into the shop in the next couple of days to have a realignment done since anything over 45 makes the car start to shake and makes driving a bit difficult.

Today, God showed me that there are still people out there in our society who are willing to help someone out when they're in distress...or just laughing their ass off in their car on the side of the road.

B.E.D.A., Day 2: Completed

BEDA 2013: An Explantion of Sorts

It's amazing how fast time has flown since New Year's.  I nearly didn't even know it was April until today when I was forced to write the date down at work.

With April, comes rain and a thing called B.E.D.A. (Blog Every Day, April). I decided that since I have been lacking the motivation and the spark of energy to write that I would participate again this year, and make sure that I post all 30 days worth for the month.

Why? Because I feel like I'm now at a spot in my life that I can pick up blogging again, or at least writing things that I can share with others.  I also think that though I'm a bit rusty from not writing the past few months that this will give me a great opportunity to dust off the keyboard and get back into the swing of things.

I also decided that this BEDA I will use this month as a learning tool.  My main goal for this month is to write pieces that I normally wouldn't write.  As of right now I'm not sure what that would include, but it will give me a sense of what I would like to work on and refine for the future endeavors with this blog or with any project requiring writing skills.

This month won't be pretty on some days, but I'm willing to take this on.

B.E.D.A., Day 1: Completed

Back on the Horse

You know when you get kicked off a horse and you're supposed to get back on it? I wouldn't actually know what getting kicked off a horse feels like, but I know the jist of what the saying means.

Doing something you've failed, or fallen track of again; aka, never giving up.

Here I am, forcing myself to blog even though I haven't really felt like it in the last several weeks. Don't get me wrong, I have several blog post ideas that I would love to actually write and post, but I just haven't been in the mood to do it.

This is me contributing to getting me back on the proverbial horse and continue to ride onward.

At this point, I think blogging again will be a nice stress reliever of the things that are currently going on.

So, here we go. Onward on the horse.

My Second Family

One of the most influential people in my life during high school was my youth leader.  She was always there for me when I needed to talk about things from church related stuff to the things I was going through during high school.  For the vast majority of my high school career I thought of my youth leader and the four other girls in my group as my family.

Today we met at her house along with some people from church to say goodbye to her and her husband as they leave this week for Oklahoma.  We laughed as we remembered all the good and the bad times we had together from our first youth events together down to the Wednesday craft nights we had during the last two summers.

On my drive home I realized that I want to be youth leader at some point.  I want to devote my weekends to helping youth raise funds for events to go to that help them grow in their faith.   I want to be apart of a youth's journey in some of the hardest years they'll face.

I know that right now I am not in the position to be the youth leader I want to be.  I understand that it may be years before I can be in a position where I am rooted in my faith and able to help others grow in theirs.

I just find it amazing how much influence people can have in a person's life.

- Jessie

Random Friday

I thought I would post this today, because it was the first thing that made me really smile and laugh today.  Who knows, I might need to watch this again in a few weeks to brighten my day up or something.

- Jessie

For the Love of Water

(photo source: Citizens Advice Bureau)

As a sustainability and environmental studies minor, I've been taking courses that have taught me in depth what being sustainable means and the environmental problems we are currently facing as well as the once we could be facing in the future years.  I get that most people will never spend over two hours doing reading, research and writing on these things on a nearly daily basis, and I get that some people will probably think I'm wasting my time for doing it.

But then I always have a specific question to ask them.  The most recent ones have been about water.  I don't ask these questions to start an argument, or to test the person's knowledge, but to get them thinking about something they probably wouldn't otherwise think of.

We started watching a film in my environmental issues class today call F. L. O. W., representing "For the Love Of Water".  It basically discusses the current water issues around the world, and doesn't just focus on one region like the United States or Africa like most films similar to this normally do.  In the class we're watching this film, we've been discussing water quite a bit and it's opened my eyes to a lot more that I normally don't think twice about.

Growing up in the country I've always drank water from our tap that comes straight from our well.  It has a purification system it goes through once the water goes through the pipes in our house.  Our well that my parents had dug back in the eighties finally went dry a couple of years ago and my parents had to pay to get a new well dug.  Since we had the new well dug the water has tasted different coming from the tap.  Because of this different taste we've gotten into the habit of buying bottled water by the cases.

(photo source: Auqafina Coupons )

I had always assumed that besides the plastic that the water was bottled in that bottle water was safe.  News flash, it's not as safe as I had assumed.  According to F.L.O.W. there are several water bottle companies that use tap water for their product and has little to no filtration or purification process.  Although in most cases, like Aquafina who says that their tap water comes from a public water source with purified water that still doesn't mean the water is completely contaminant free.

Sadly, there is no way to know 100% for sure if the water we drink on a day to day basis is free of harmful things similar to atrazine a chemical of which we are unsure of the health side affects or problems that are caused by the consumption of it in water.

Does this mean that I've gotten paranoid about my water? No.  What it means for me is that when I drink water, I do consider the things that I have knowledge of.  I understand that in order to stay healthy I have to drink a lot of water, and although I can not determine how healthy my water really is, that since I have survived this long, I'm sure I'll be alright for a while.  I understand that the water issues in our world are so large that I can not simply refuse to drink water because of the unknown and even the known facts.

I am curious though to see what other people think about their water and have made a short survey to see what responses I can collect.  If you would like to share your thoughts, please help out by taking the survey or commenting.

I'm most positive that I will address water issues again in the next few months!

- Jessie

Sibling Adventures

It all began with a text message reading, "how much does a can of mace cost?" that started my adventure last night with my brother.

Our campus is really small, and unfortunately though we live in a safe city we've still got some problems of safety to worry about.  Throughout last semester we had a "visitor" who would appear at our dorm building late in the night wearing absolutely nothing.  The police department keeps getting closer and closer to catching the guy but he's still out smarting us.  Well, he visited again two nights ago, at his earliest time, eleven in the evening.

When I found out about this most recent sighting I sent my brother a text message asking how much mace cost.  I had told him over Christmas break about the issue and we discussed some tactical defense stuff.  No worries until I told him about it yesterday and that I was nervous to walk to the library in the evening after dark now that this guy is back at it again with no pattern in his visits.

So, I went home last night for a few hours.  My brother and I went to Gander Mountain, our favorite place for outdoor gear.  He bought me mace to put on my key chain, mace to keep in my car, and a really nice defensive tactical knife.  When we  home, my brother "certified" me in training with the mace after we did some practice shots with the pretend mace that had come with one of the packages.

I've always felt safe with my brother when he's taught me defensive skills, and he's the only one I would trust to willingly mace me.  He didn't mace me too bad and kept it away from my face for the most part, but I got to experience what it would feel like if I had to actually use my mace and got struck with some of it by the wind.

I don't recall cursing so much in such a short span of time when my brother made me flush the mace off of my neck and face by standing in the cold water for over fifteen minutes, or having something irritate my skin as much as the mace did.  I'm thankful for the experience, though I'm still having to take colder showers than normal not to irritate any left over mace in my skin, I'm prepared for what might happen and can concentrate through the pain.

- Jessie

Friendship = Support

I've been through quite a bit in the last three years.  I had my hip replaced my junior year of high school, I stumbled my way through senior year and began college.  Now, a time when I thought I had it all together is started to unravel at the seams.

To keep the story some what simple, things aren't as happy as I sometimes make them appear in my life.  I have always been someone to make the best of things and make people think that I'm a happy person no matter what the situation or circumstance is.  I'm tired of just settling for something when in reality it doesn't make me happy.

I'm at a place now where I'm confused, frustrated, upset and feeling lonely.  I have no idea what I'm doing in most aspects and as I've realized God's calling for me isn't in the current field of study I'm working on, I feel like no one is going to be supportive of this new change.

Of the few friends I've discussed these things with in the last few days, none of them have seemed to be very supportive.  They've basically tried telling me that it's a crock of BS and that I need to get over it.  Here's the thing though, I respect their opinions but I'm tired of settling for the things that don't make me happy as a human being.  When I have little to not motivation or drive to be here, then clearly I am meant to be some place else.

I guess, in the end of today's events, I just want friendships that are going to support me with whatever I decide to do.  I've always tried to be the supportive friend hoping that one day when I really the support that my friends would be there to provide it.

In the end, I know that I can always rely on God.  It's taken me months to finally accept my calling and the direction He wants me to go in, and I know that He's going to be there until the very end.

- Jessie

Concrete Confines

(photo credit: morguefile dot com)

Last week for my literature and the environment class we had to read Thoreau's Walking. To be brutally honest, I didn't read the entire thing because I lost interest after the sixth page.  I did however gain a new look to the natural world from those six pages I did read.

In general, Thoreau is writing that people are chained to their workplace and their homes when instead they should be outside witnessing and experiencing nature.  The problem with this today is that so much of what we do relies on technology.  Don't get me wrong, I love technology and how it has revolutionized our world, but if you stop and think about it, it makes some sense.

Instead of kids going outside and playing after school they end up sitting in front of the television either watching a show that promotes bad habits or playing video games.  If it's not in front of the television it's in front of the computer.  It's not just limited to the kids either, adults are the same way.  Come home from work and what's the first things you think about? Personally, as a college student and a person who has grown up mostly in the outdoors, I come home and go straight to the social networking on my laptop.

I went for a walk yesterday in one of my favorite parks in the area.  It's really lovely because there are wide walking paths that wrap around the entire park so you can see everything that's going on.  The path even breaks up at different parts to form a two mile, mile and quarter mile paths.  What I realized yesterday while taking this walk was that in order for me to get motivated to go on a walk I had gotten in my car and driven fifteen minutes to a place that has thousands of dollars worth of concrete when I had the countryside in my backyard to take advantage on such a wonderful January day.

It got me thinking back to Thoreau's writing.  Our norm is concrete.  Everywhere around us there is some form of concrete structure standing. From roads, sidewalks to buildings, there's a lot more concrete than you first think once you start looking.  We've become a society that continues to keep building, and in some cases we keep building when there is no need to do so.  We're caging ourselves into this concrete jungle where the natural world is slowly being closed off every day.

The photo for this week's GBE prompt made me think of my walk and the realizations I had about our concrete confines.  I wish I lived in a place like the photo, where there is minimal interference by humans in a world where nature takes it's course.

- Jessie

Making History

Like thousands of other people around the country and world, I watched President Obama's inauguration yesterday.  I was glued to the television for the entire morning and most of the evening watching the events with my roommate.  I found myself annoyed with the phrase "we're making history".

I wish that everyone would say that to themselves every day, because in reality it is true.  Not one of us can predict the future, but the events that take place now are history.  We will never know exactly how much our day to day or even major events will impact the world, it will be laid out before the future generations to see our impact.

While others got heated about the presidential election in 2012, I took some words from one of my professors and sat back and looked at things objectively.  Just because I voted one way didn't mean that the things my candidate said would solve themselves within the first few days, weeks, months or even years.  Even if they did, I wouldn't necessarily see the impact of those things on my country for at least twenty years down the road.

While we are making history every second of every day, I think that many people take it for granted and confuse large events are the only things to make it in history.  In twenty years my friends' children might be reading of these big events in their history text books, but you can only put so much history in one book (yes, surprise, surprise, we have to pick and chose which is the most important to learn about).

I guess, in a simplified version, that I feel like many people are always thinking and living in the present instead of thinking ahead to the coming years.

- Jessie

To The Next Four Years

Four years ago I was a freshmen in high school who could talk politics like an adult with my parents.  I watched as the election happened throughout the year and in some cases I probably devoted a bit too much time to watching the news and reading about the candidates and their platforms as they traveled the country.  Four years ago, I watched in my English class as President Obama was sworn in as president. I missed lunch to watch the coverage with my teacher.

Over the last four years I've laid off on watching the news as much as I had.  Probably, in most cases, I care too less about it now considering that I spend most of my time looking at the past instead of the current affairs.  Yesterday though, I couldn't miss the inauguration.

In many ways I feel as if I have grown up with Obama but in a different way compared to how I grew up with Bush.  I was a second grader when 9/11 happened, I knew who President Bush was ever since.  I grew up as a grade school child with her older brother deployed in Iraq.  I even remember at some points that I was angry with President Bush because I couldn't always talk to my big brother and he could never tell me where he was at.  Did I understand that he was not the direct person in charge of my brother's phone calls, no.  To a grade school kid who didn't understand, I went through phases where I hated President Bush.

I say that I've grown up with Obama in a different way than I did with Bush.  I went through high school seeing how Obama handled the things that were left over from Bush and the new things that were being thrown at him.  As a high school kid, I was starting to figure out what my beliefs were and what I wanted my life as an American to be like. In so many aspects, I feel as if President Obama's first term is personally connected to my life.

It's just an odd thing to think that four years ago marked the beginning of my high school years and the first term of President Obama's office and now as his second term begins I am starting my higher education.  With the next four years ahead of our country, and for me personally, I think that the amount of things we can accomplish will baffle future generations when they study us in history.

- Jessie

And Run

Every once in a while when I'm loading up on my music through iTunes, I take a risk and buy an entire album from a band.  I may have heard a couple of songs off of it but in general I've never had much to do with that band.  The last time I did this however, I took a leap and bought the entire album from a band I had heard of through Abby on YouTube called He Is We.

 

For the most part when I've done this I've had only but great experiences with finding new songs that fit in with my life or that just make me happy and want to dance.  There's always been those three or four songs though that I don't really care for and skip over when I hear them on shuffle.  When I bought My Forever I listened to the entire album like I would normally do, and then I kept in on repeat when I found that everything on the album was something I wanted to listen to.

 

One of my favorites is And Run, a song that I have found myself playing every time I drive back to Winfield after spending a weekend with my parents and need some motivation to get the week started off.  I was curious to see if they had a YouTube video for the song since I normally don't have that much time to wait on YouTube to load I never got the chance to look.  They do, and I thought I would share with you the acoustic version so you can hear Rachel's beautiful voice.

 

 

 

"And Run"

Kinda wish I had the courage,
A bit of bravery.
So tired of waiting on a man to come and save me.
Wishing I had everything,
Or something really.
I do admit it,
But now I’m thinking freely.

I’m going to open my mind to all these,
New found exciting possibilities.

I’m making all my own plans,
Throwing all my old ones away.
Gonna grow up, Be someone.
Draw a map, find a path.
Take a breath and run.
And run.

Filling my head with words to encourage me,
Gotta get my act so straight so I can truly believe.
That what I’m waiting for, is really worth the wait.
Stop bringing myself down,
I gotta know what makes me great.

I’m going to open my mind to all these,
New found exciting possibilities.

I’m making all my own plans,
Throwing all my old ones away.
Gonna grow up, Be someone.
Draw a map, find a path.
Take a breath and run.

I am trying to get past this,
Be better than I once was.
Tired of waiting, on someone else.
I am trying to get past this,
Be better than I once was.
Tired of waiting on someone else,
I can fix it by myself.
I’m finally taking a stand,
I’ve learned from all my mistakes.
I’m making all my own plans,
Throwing all my old ones away.
Gotta grow up, be someone.
Draw a map, find a path.
Take a breath and run.

Run, run, run, run.
Run, run, run, run.

Normally I will stick to loving the acoustic version of a song but the album version of And Run is really upbeat and makes me want to sing along and smile.  I can't even begin to express how much this song has helped keep me motivated through the last few weeks of the semester before I took finals.

- Jessie

Innocent Faces

In the three weeks that I've had my iPhone, I have taken several photos of our dogs. Normally we only have the two small dogs around but since my brother is in town we've had to put up with two small dogs and the elephant that he claims is his dog Annie.

In these weeks that my brother and I have been home, I've captured the dogs at various moments. Sadly, all of the photos make them appear like they are completely innocent. Annie herself was caught red pawed after eating a double batch if cookies.

Normally I can't even get him to face the camera, but when I do, the flash makes him look like a demon dog.  I see how it is Draco, I see how it is.

 

This was taken the day that I came home from college for break.  I was sitting in my dad's chair working on a project and he just assumed that there was plenty of room to take a nap on the laptop.

I'm pretty sure he spends most of his days like this.

Meet Annie.  Probably one of the most lovable dogs you could meet, as long as she knows you're not trying to tresspass into our yard that is.

With an extra dog in the house, there's been a high demand for attention.

Movie night with dad and brother, Annie's favorite spot was the couch with me.

Missy Ann, going on nine years old and is still one of the most awesome dogs I've gotten to call my own during my life.

Don't let this one fool you, she likes to stretch out and hog the entire couch.

He's not very smart.  He sat over five minutes with my brother's hat on before he finally tried getting out of it.

Cookie Monster claims my dad's chair the morning that we find out who ate the cookies.

 

My weiner dog likes to play the innocent card.

His favorite spot is sitting in the window, waiting on mom to come home from work.

 

 

There are so many more photos of the dogs, but I decided would spam Instagram with all of them.

 

- Jessie

Academic Goals: Semester 2

This coming Monday I will be starting my second semester of college.  With the new year and the new semester starting at nearly the same time, I've decided to make a list of some goals for this semester, hoping that maybe I can keep on top of things and complete everything on this list.

• complete and turn in every assignment, on time
• complete all readings
• form a study group for history classes
• ask questions in class - be rutheless!
• begin papers earlier than the day before they are due
• finish papers more than thirty minutes before they're due
• figure out how to write in APA format
• go to class every day
• say no to things that will distract from studying - like watching movies
• try something new!

I'm sure as the next week or two arrives and passes I'll have more to add to this list, I think it's a good starting place.

- Jessie

Wishing for a Chance

The last few days I've been very contemplative about some things.  Most of the things I've been thinking of have been goals for the next four years.  Everything I had been looking forward to or working towards all happened in 2012.  It's 2013 and I don't know what I'm working towards now besides the general graduating from college in 2016.  Besides thinking of these things I've been spending more time thinking about my hip.

Febuary 14th will mark my two year anniversary since I had my hip replaced.  I've been struggling the last few months with being a college student and having to look at things differently because of my disability, but the most frustrating thing has been expressing my thoughts.

In many aspects it's difficult to explain what I want to express and why.  In short, I know I have a story to share and I feel like this year is the time to get it out. I'm just wishing that the chance to do it doesn't slip by unnoticed.

- Jessie

Welcome to 2013

At the beginning of the semester I had a sit down with my academic advisor and he asked me if I had any goals for the next few years. I told him honestly I didn't have a clue what I was going to do with my life.  It was then that he told me I needed to start figuring some sort of goals out.

As I welcome 2013 into my life, I'm not going to give myself a set of resolutions. Instead, I'm giving myself a set of goals that I can look back on throughout the year.  Goals are made to motivate someone to do some sort of achievement.  Not all goals are met, but they can be changed and worked on as time goes on.

So, with that being said, here is my list of goals for 2013.

• turn in every assignment; on time
• be more honest with others and myself
• commit to things - don't be afraid to say no if it's too much to handle
• laugh more often
• do a walk for charity event
• spend less time thinking about what could go wrong and just live
• learn how to ride a bike
• put education first - everything else isn't as important as my future, I'm in charge of it
• slow down and enjoy life
• forgive those who have wronged me
• read the books I want - give honest feedback
• say "I love you" to those I love more often
• go to church on a regular basis during the weekend - spend more time with scriptures during the week
• travel to western Kansas to see my cousins
• use my car less often - in general decrease CO2 emissions whenever possible
• plan to travel to all the places in Kansas I've wanted to visit - including Mount Sunflower
• go to the zoo for the day and take pictures
• conquer a fear
• go on a hike
• chase some storms
• go on a road trip
• write whenever possible - about all things
• stop apologizing for being myself
• have an exercise routine
• take more pictures - enjoy the moment and capture it
• write more letters - via snail mail
• plan days for no social networking or internet
• climb the 77 steps more often
• eat when hungry - say no to cafeteria meals if not
• get boater safety license
• make the library my home again
• spread the word about young hip replacement patients - share my story

If I can accomplish everything on this list, and then some, I'm sure that 2013 will be a fantastic year.

- Jessie