It's Sinking In

Currently I'm speechless.  When I admit that I'm speechless, I really am speechless.  Why am I so speechless you might ask, well it's all sinking in.

In November I was shocked when I opened our mailbox to find a large envelope from SC's Green Team.  Jason, the GT sponsor, was offering me a scholarship.  That day, my parents and I were so tickled with that envelope we couldn't stop talking about it.

Since then the talk has died down a little bit. But everyone once in a while when we run into someone that we haven't seen in a few months, my mom is the first to share the news and smile like a grinning fool.  She is also the one that talks most about SC and how excited we are about the school.

A couple of weeks ago, I finally got everything the admissions committee needed, including a few extra letters explaining why I'm one semester short on my transcript and why my grades aren't the best of things in this world.  I've been milling around since then, just waiting and waiting.  I tried my hardest not to think about it, but my anxiety over things reflecting a lot on my near future kind of got in the way.

I was wondering what I would do if SC didn't accept me.  I hadn't planned on anything other than SC since fall of 2010 when I first met with Rodney, one of the SC representatives who has been ever so helpful over the last couple of years.  I was getting pretty worked up over this too.  I had started looking into some community colleges and started filling out a couple of applications.  I was just worried that one of my fears was going to come true and that I would be stuck there suspended in mid air only to fall flat on my face and not be able to have a second option to turn to.

I hadn't sent any of my other applications out yet though, and what do you know, the stars aligned and God did what He does and I got a pretty e-mail in my inbox yesterday from Rodney.

What I'm getting at ladies and gentlemen is this: I'm officially a Southwestern College Moundbuilder!

I should clarify, I actually read my acceptance e-mail via Facebook. I don't know if that's a thing that SC does, or if Rodney does it, or if he did it because he's gotten to know me over the last few months and decided to let me know once he found out or not.  Regardless, when I first read: "Congratulations on your acceptance to Southwestern College!" I felt mixed emotions. I felt a jolt of excitement, a rush of adrenaline and a little shock.  It happened so fast that I actually started crying on the spot.

I of course, yelled too. After managing to calm the dogs down I called my mom, though I was still crying.  She was confused at first because I had stayed home yesterday and went to the doctor because of a horrible ear ache.  Later she told me that she thought something bad had happened at the doctor's office.  I told her the news though, over the phone, even though I'm not supposed to call her at work, I just couldn't contain the excitement and I had to share it with her; she had worked so hard with me to get here, I couldn't wait until she got home.

Rodney had told me to watch in the mail for a purple envelope in the mail with the official letter and the typical "you've been accepted" type things.  I was expecting Tuesday to see my purple evelope in the rusted out and bullet hole covered mailbox.  Low and behold, today when we got home from the Sport Boat and Travel Show, mom checked the mailbox and found a PURPLE envelope. We both screamed in excitement.

We didn't realize that
A) It was a big envelope
or
B) it was going to be that purple.

Of course, we all rushed inside so I could open it. It was probably a good thing I waited to open it in the house because it was packed with lots of SC goodies.

More sticky notes, another pen with sticky notes inside,
a jinx bracelet, a key holder, and another lanyard (the third
one to be exact).

Now, as I'm sitting here with a pounding headache and my ears aching so badly I want to scratch the entire ear canal out of my body, I realize that this is really happening.  I'm growing up.  Before I know it graduation will be here and then gone.  New Orleans trip will have passed and I'll be starting a brand new chapter in a massive series of books called My Life as I begin college.  As much as I want to say "This can't be true, pinch me and I'll wake up", I know it isn't.

I just now realized how much enthusiasm
I'm lacking from being ill.
But it's true, I'm accepted!

The last few months I think my parents have slowly started realizing these things too.  That in a few short months they'll be following me down to Winfield and helping me move into my first living space outside of their house and then leaving me behind when they go home.  My dad though, I kind of worry what he'll be like when that time comes. I know that both of my parents are going to try to be the big macho parents on campus and try sucking it up and not crying in front of me, but I know they will.

Especially my dad.  We've been through a lot this past year, and in 2012, though we're only two months in, we've spent a lot of time together and have had some great laughs (so many in fact there were a few instances where I'm sure we almost pooped ourselves...).  I guess in some ways I'm kind of a daddy's girl.  He'll be the first to break, I just know it.  But this isn't what I'm worried about.  I know it's normal for parents to get emotional about their children moving out and things, especially their youngest, I get it.  I'm worried about how my dad will handle it two or three months after they leave me at school.  Don't get me wrong, I'm not going to be one of those kids who comes home only on holidays, I live too close to do that kind of thing, plus, I love my family and my mom's cooking.  I think it's just going to be hard for him because we've begun to patch our relationship up and then I'm moving out.

I know though, that this is just something we're all going to have to adjust to.  Life is constantly changing and we're all having to constantly adapt.  I'm sure the first few months will be difficult on all of us, but I know we're going to make it through, we have no other choice, eh?  If there's anything else I know, it's that God will be with both of my parents and make them feel secure about everything.

Bit of a long winded post, eh? I just had to share the news and feelings, it's a massive thing happening.  I mean, actually, legitimately, happening now.  It's all real.

Also, while we were out and about today, that is before we came home to my purple envelope, we some how ended up in a kitchen store some where between Park City and Newton (I fell asleep after we hit Park City, so I really don't know where it's at) and I found a jinx cookie cutter! The jinx cat is affiliated with SC, it's kind of the unofficial mascot for the school, I'll have to explain soon.  I'll have to make sure to post photos of my test cookies for graduation using the jinx cookie cutter. (:

I wasn't even planning on having cookies at my graduation
party. I couldn't pass up a jinx cookie cutter though!

Link of the day: Awesomeness that is my good friend Jess, who I met via the internet a couple years ago.  She lives across that MASSIVE pond and makes cakes that make me drool. She's pretty awesome.

Days until graduation: 91
Days until moving day: 177

BEDD 27: revelations of the future

It seems like the questions: "What are you doing next year?" and "How did you decide on that, are you sure it's what you want to do?" are becoming more and more frequent as graduation draws closer and closer each day.

"What are you doing next year?" is usually answered with me grinning ear to ear and talking about my college of choice and their history program along with other awesome stuff from the college.  It's the following question that normally gets me tied up though, the: "How did you decide on that?"  To be honest, I'm not even sure.

There for a really long time I was bouncing back and forth between ideas of what I wanted to do after high school.  All of them though did include going to college.  First I couldn't decide on a college, then I couldn't decide on what I wanted to major in.  And then back and forth. I couldn't decide on a college or a major let alone both.  For a good solid year and a half I wanted to major in political science (polisci), and then I went to a meeting with the representatives from the college I'm (planning on) going to next year and those ideas started to slowly change.

SC didn't offer polisci as a major, and I was on the verge of dismissing it completely.  It's a private college with tuition prices to match.  For some reason, I couldn't get the idea of SC out of my head, the only major drawbacks at that time for me not wanting to go to SC were the tuition prices and not having my major.

As I continued through the semester, I began thinking about other routes I could take that could potentially make me end up in a similar area that I had orginially started thinking about, which at this point I can't even remember what that was but I think it had something to do with law school in the far off future.  I had then confronted my parents telling them about SC and how I would major in history and minor in polisci instead.  My parents were both really hesitant about even making an appointment to go down to the school for a visit let alone apply.

Since I stepped foot on the SC campus, I knew SC was the right pick for me, and once I started talking to the professors and students at SC, I started feeling more comfortable with my choice.  It only took the one visit for my parents to fall in love with the school too.  My mom is just as thrilled if not even more than I am to go to SC.

I don't know why, but the idea of studying history has grown on me so much over the last year; and I've learned a lot about myself too in the process.  I'm just happy that I've found something that I enjoy and can still learn so much about and a school that fits just right with everything I could imagine.

They tell us in school when we talk with representatives from colleges and universities from across the state that we don't have to know 100% what we want to do with our lives before graduation, that the majority of people end up changing their majors in college; but I enjoy learning the mysteries behind what we are today.  I honestly can't see myself not pursuing history, but then again, I'm trusting my gut and my heart to lead the way; I'm open to anything in life.

Link of the day: Entanglement Goodness, I've spent a lot of time playing this game for several days now.  I find it so addicting to play while watching the evening news.

days until Senior Year Part 2 begins: 8
days until I become an adult: 11
days until graduation: 143

unicorn random

Preface: I'm in a really good mood right now but also short on time, so this will probably contribute to lack of cohesiveness.  Also, I have a weird obsession lately with unicorns. I blame Krista Horner.

PART 1

Considering how much school I've missed in the last two and a half weeks mostly due to a really bad sinus infection and basically every single joint in my body hurting to the point where I'm limited in moving, today was a REALLY productive and good day at school. I managed to get everything organized finally, which I've been needing to do for a super long time but things kept being pushed my way.  I'm hoping that within the next week, if it productivity stays like it was for today, that I'll be mostly caught up.

PART 2

I finally got enough nerve to shred the paper application up and apply online to SC.  So that's a thing.  Now all I have to do is write my essay, which you'd think would be pretty easy for me considering how I enjoy writing and blogging. BUT IT'S SO MUCH HARDER THAN THAT.  I have absolutely no idea how to write about myself technically.  Although, it's mostly just coming up with interesting transitions to transition from my points, because let's be honest, when they ask for some back ground information about you plus your goals in life AND how the school can help you achieve them, it's a bit difficult to come up with transitions that are just run of the mill. I guess I'm just making this too difficult on myself. I just really really want my essay to stand out.

PART 3

I'm pretty much recovered from taking the ACT on Saturday.  It didn't feel like it took four hours, but I guess that's all because I was so focused on it.  To be honest, I'm sure my scores are pretty horrid looking. Except for the grammar, it's basically like proofing a paper, and that was really easy. Especially since it was multiple choice, I like multiple choice questioned tests.

So once we get the feedback from ACT it'll be sent down to SC and, allowing that I've already sent my essay, the admissions office will look at my application.

PART 4

I once, a very long time ago, thought of majoring in English.

NEVER.

PART 5

I currently hold in my position my good friend's keyboard piano.  And of course, considering piano is something I'd like to learn, have been taking advantage of having it in my posession.  I'm so committed to learning that I managed to talk my mom into getting an adult beginner piano book from Amazon.  Also, my best friend Jessie, she gave me some sight reading books to practice with since I was never good at sight reading to begin with.

PART 6

Remember when I said I was going to give blood a while back? Yeah, I survived, obviously.  And today I finally got a letter from the American Red Cross.  It was basically a letter thanking me for donating and the statistics of young adults and children who need blood, and how most first time donors never donate again.  I mean, that was cool and all, but I got a special card with my name and blood type on it for future donations. I think that's the moral of this story. Is that I have yet another special card to carry around with me.

PART 7

I'm. so. excited. for. NaNoWriMo. to. start. already.

PART 8

The show is going...good.  We're behind since we started a couple weeks later than we normally do with musicals.  But I've got my costumes lined out and things.  Now I just remember the dancing, music and when to go on stage.  Oh, I still need to learn how to BE A MAN. It'll probably come more natural once we start doing runs in costume.

Today was awesome because: it's been super productive.

current location: on the floor in my bedroom

days until NaNoWriMo begins: 7

days until the fall musical: 24

days until I become an adult: 75

days until graduation: 208