Zen Moment of the Day: History

I'm sure I've mentioned this before, but I really love history.  Last semester the history class that seniors are required to take, civics, wasn't anything I'd like to do again.  In reality it wasn't the class itself, but how it was taught that me struggle through the semester.  This semester, I have to history classes, T (United States Topics, deals with U.S. history from the end of World War II to present day; this is the other required senior history class) and AS (American Studies, junior history course that I have to retake from missing it last year when I was out for surgery); both of them are fantastic, mostly because of having the same teacher that cares not only about his students but about helping them learn.

As I sat here and finished my assignment from Monday to turn in for T, I realized that when I'm working on my history assignments I'm completely relaxed.  I have no problem reading from a textbook and answering analytic questions about events that took place.  Maybe I have too much of having no problem doing it, I tend to have at least one page longer in all my assignments because I elaborate so much on everything.

There's something about being completely indulged in what I'm reading that I just naturally relax.  It's really nice, especially since I've been ill and have been stressing about getting caught up in my other classes, it's nice to be able to just lose myself in one or in this case two classes and enjoy myself.

Link of the day: Quote of the Day I love reading the QotD on GoodReads. Since I don't know if this will continue to link directly to this specific quote I'm going to type it out.

"After all, reading is arguably a far more creative and imaginative process than writing; when the reader creates emotion in their head, or the colors of the sky during the setting sun, or smell of a warm summer's breeze on their face, they should reserve as much praise for themselves as they do for the writer - perhaps more."

~ Jasper Fforde

days until 01/15/12: 4

days until Valentine's Day: 34

days until graduation: 128

scattered thoughts

Right now I don't feel like doing much of anything except sleeping, sitting on the couch and watching TV or watching YouTube videos.  The last time I felt this bad, not counting the flu last month, has had to have been at least a year ago.  I've got chest congestion, sore throat, massive headache and I'm on the verge of tearing my ear canals out because I can feel the fluid pressing and thus making me scratch at me ears every few minutes.  Chances are I have a sinus infection, I'm not new to having them, I've probably had one each year for quite a while.  I was going to go to school today because I'm trying not to miss any school this semester, but my mom and dad made the decision quite clear last night that I was staying home today. And it was probably a good idea they said so, because I feel even worse than I did last night when we got home from the finacial aid meeting.  Now I'm just waiting for a couple of hours for when my mom comes home to get me to drive me to the family doctor.

Yesterday wasn't too bad, if I completely ignored the sore throat, beginnings of a headache and ears hurting.  It was a productive day for me, I managed to finish my ES worksheet packet and begin my outline for the next section, I figured out what I wanted to do for my E3 paper, used the school computers for the first time in roughly a month and managed not to yell or hit said computer.  I completed the majority of my T assignment, and I would have finished if it I did what all the others kids do and rush through it and not take the time to be thorough in their answers.  Went to E4 and...well, we won't talk about that right now, it makes me want to go back to bed. Actually did an actual assignment from the book in my M class.  And then in AS we were just watching Uncle Tom's Cabin. For me, that was a productive day, and thus far every day has been similar since term started.  I'm thinking that this might continue, and I hope so because then I keep up with all my classes.  Plus I have that A2 class online, but I'll talk about that some other time.

Also. Yesterday the casting list was posted for the mystery dinner theatre that the thespian club is doing in February.  I auditioned for it last Thursday and had kind of forgotten about it since then.  I didn't get the role I wanted, but I got cast in it regardless.  I'm a twin lunch lady; the other actor is one of my good friends; and the best part about this is the fact that one of us is evil and the other is nice.  Needless to say, I'm extremely excited to work on this show!

Well, I'm sure I've rambled enough nonsense for the day, I should go take a nap now.

Link of the day: Back to December I enjoyed the original song by Taylor Swift, but when I watched this earlier, I have to admit, Luke and Ingrid's cover makes me love it even more. Well, actually, I think I just love their cover better.

days until 01/15/12: 5
days until Valentine's Day: 35
days until graduation: 129

bucket list: part three

I was going to introduce my new blog series that will begin 16th today but by the time I finished up my homework, spent some quality time with my parents and the dogs and checked my e-mail I got extremely tired.  So instead, I'm giving you another installment to my bucket list, a couple of these might be a bit weird and/or surprising I think...

• explore Pompeii Ever since I watched the episode of Destination Truth when they went to Pompeii and investigated I've really wanted to go there.  This is mainly because of the nerdiness I have with history and with the simple fact that I find the history of Pompeii exciting and interesting. I do admit, I forgot about my fascination with Pompeii until today when we started talking about volcanoes in my Earth Space Science class.
• see a Broadway show I remember back in middle school when my friend and I bet each other who would end up performing on Broadway first. And then five years later we're both going in completely different routes.  Moral of story, I've always been interested in shows on Broadway, mainly from my love of theatre and catchy show tunes.
• visit every American Legion Post My parents have told me several times over the course of my life time that within 24 hours of my birth I was at the Mulvane Post. I have literally spent most of my life in that building and devoting everything I have to it.  We have a collection of license plate tags from other posts in the nation, and it's always got me asking questions about other posts since the only one I've ever really been around is the Mulvane one.  This is a large feat, considering there are hundreds in the nation and a few over seas as well.  I want to do it though, and bring something back from each one; just to say that I've done it.  Plus, it'd give me an opportunity to meet new veterans and learn their stories.

Link of the Day: American Legion I'm sure that their site can answer more questions on what we do than I can. Or at least to a greater degree.

Also, this is just a side note, but next month I could get inducted into the American Legion Auxiliary officially. I won't be a Junior Auxiliary member anymore. I can't believe I'm growing up.

BEDD 21: the secret book

I was actually quite excited to share another free write excessive I did a few weeks ago, but when I went through and looked for the document I had saved it in, I couldn't find it.  I think I might have accidentally deleted it when I was cleaning out my documents on my laptop.

That's alright though, because what I'm about to tell you pertains in a way to free writing.  Actually it doesn't, but it does have something to do with writing as you might have guessed from the title.

I'm writing a book.

I knew when NaNo ended last month that there was something I wanted to write about, but I just couldn't put my finger on it.  It definitely wasn't the route I had taken for my NaNo novel, but on a different path.  I actually didn't even figure out what path I wanted to go for this "secret book" until about ten minutes ago when I began to free write.  My original plan for this "secret book" was pretty out there and a confusing concept that I had already been having some questions about whether or not I wanted to even attempt that level of writing yet or not.

I'm telling you all for you to know, because even though I want to keep this to myself for a while, I feel like I need to let someone know of what I'm doing.  This book isn't just going to be for the fun of it, but to also help me learn about something I've always wanted to more about and to help educate others.

"Why are you telling us about it if you're going to keep it all a secret?" you might ask.  Well, BECAUSE. I just am.

Link of the day: The Party Music III video by LiveLavaLive makes me laugh so hard I'm to the point of tears every time I watch it.  Definitely a good one to watch if you're having a bad day, it'll at least put a smile on your face.

days until Christmas: 3
days until I become an adult: 17
days until graduation: 149

BEDD 15: emotional wreck

You know, I feel like bawling right now. It's not because I had a bad day at school. Not because of arthritis pain or any of that.  But because my brother is hurting in a way that I've never seen him hurt, and it tears me to pieces because I can't do a single thing about it, let alone actually be there in person to give him a hug and tell him things will get better.

My brother and I are fifteen years apart, so it's been difficult at times in the past to connect with each other because of our age differences.  I think the only thing that we can connect on that doesn't require age is hunting and fishing, because it involves two of our favorite things, guns and fish.

Over the years I haven't seen too much of my brother Bill, who I call Bubby.  Fifteen when I was born, he went off to the United States Marine Corps boot camp right after he graduated in 1997.  He had been stationed in Okinawa for several years after he finished boot camp.  And then when the bombing of the Twin Towers happened, he had just coincidentally been state side during the events, not too long after that happened he was deployed to Kuwait where he eventually ended up in Iraq.

Here's the thing about Marines, they can appear emotionless and hard faced whenever they want.  Trained to focus and not let anything bother them in their path to completing their objective.  In all the moments that I've been with my brother, he's never appeared to be upset.  I have learned to read his face and know when he's angry or annoyed and when he's happy.  But today, today just makes me hurt too.

My mom got a message from my brother, about a good friend of his, Mr. Ken.  He worked with Mr. Ken since he had gotten out of the Marines back in 2004 and went to work at an oil refinery as a rigger.  Mr. Ken along with another man called Bomber, were like his older brothers he never had.  Mr. Ken and bomber helped my brother when he started working at the refinery.  Mr. Ken taught my brother so much about the line of work he's in that he's just amazed a man could know and care so much.

What has me upset about my brother, is this. He found out that Mr. Ken had passed away. That in itself is upsetting to hear about, but what I hadn't realized until my mom told me what Bubby said, was that Mr. Ken was only a year younger than our dad.  So that has Bubby and I both thinking.

It just tears me apart knowing that my brother is taking this news so hard, especially since it's the holiday season, and I can't be there to offer comfort.  All I want to do is get in my car and drive non-stop to Texas and give him a hug.  I've been thinking all evening about my brother and Bomber, and Mr. Ken's family.  I just want them to have some comfort right now and get through this.

I know this was a bit of a downer for a blog post as I slowly make my return back to blogging, but I've never felt this far away from my brother before.  Even when I was younger and he was in Iraq.  But I can't even compare those two because I was younger and didn't understand.

Do me a favor?  Tell your friends and family you love them; life is just too short.

Link of the day: SolarBeat is indescribable.  It combines music with our solar system and is just completely beautiful.

days until winter break: 6
days until Christmas: 10
days until I become an adult: 23
days until graduation: 155

BEDD 12: not the time

Today's blog comes in many parts.

PART 1

The lack of blogging the past week has been due to the fact that my mom, dad and I all ended up getting really ill with the flu. It was so bad. I can't even begin to tell you, in fact, I'm not ever going there because I want to spare you from the horribleness.  I can't remember the last time I was this ill where I couldn't do much of anything just because my entire body just ached.

PART 2

And of course, I had to fall really ill at the middle of a semi-important week that lead up to the ACT on Saturday, of which I did not attend because I knew I wouldn't be able to focus or not get sick for four.  Also, thought I was in the clear to go back to school today because I was feeling a lot better yesterday afternoon, GUESS NOT. And that's all we'll say on that matter.

PART 3

I'll still complete BEDD, but not with the structure I've outlined myself, because this month I actually have a lot on my mind that I want to blog about specifically.  I will however keep Wednesdays and Sundays the same, I kind of like those days.

PART 4

Also, this is irrelevant to everything else that I've mentioned, but for my (really lousy) goal that I set for myself this year on GoodReads, I'm two books away.  I finished the book I had been reading today, because of the whole still being ill and not ready to go back to school thing.  I was holding off on re-reading the Harry Potter series until the New Year, but I decided I'd go ahead and read the first two to finish off my goal, plus things have been rough lately (not just being ill) and I've always reverted back to reading the Harry Potter books when I get in a major funk, they always seem to help.

PART 5

Also irrelevant, I still haven't even started Christmas shopping yet.

Link of the day: Christmas Doodles just made me smile quite a lot and just uplifted my day. Plus it got me back into the holiday spirit.

days until winter break: 9

days until I become an adult: 26

days until graduation: 158

BEDD 5: traveling America

I'm sure that I've mentioned this before, that I want to travel through all 50 states in the United States and our territories.  I want to do this even more since I've narrowed down my options on my major for next year.  I've decided that out of all the history of the world, I want to study that of my favorite country and the one that I call home.

I find wars extremely interesting, although many believe that the wars and conflicts that we have been in through the years shouldn't be spoken of, I completely disagree. I believe the extreme opposite. We should learn everything we can about the wars we've been directly and indirectly apart of, including the views of others in other countries on the war in question.

The most interesting wars I find, which is difficult for me to pinpoint because of them are completely different in many senses, is the Revolutionary War and the Civil War.  Both of these I automatically think of when I think of my future plans to travel through all 50 states and territories.  Without the Revolutionary War (and Civil War) we wouldn't be the country that we are today, and we wouldn't have any significance to places on the east coast where so many people lost their lives.

Anyway, back on track. There for a bit, I was considering of deleting this blog. I don't really know why, but I was strongly considering it.  But then when I began to think about the conversations I've had with my brother about traveling during and after college and university, I decided not to delete it after all.

Bit of a ramble, and not really completely finished with in thoughts, but I think this is all my brain can handle for now, I'll continue on Saturday maybe...

Link of the day: Wayne Moran Photography is just awesome. I don't even know how I found such awesomeness, but I did. I am just in love with this photography I could probably spend all night just drooling over these photos.

days until ACT round 2: 5
days until I become an adult: 34
days until graduation: 166

BEDD 4: airplane firsts

Yesterday while I was decorating the apartment with my mom, I started to think about past Christmases.  Most of them have been the same, staying at home with mom and dad and just have a nice lazy day full of food and movies and occasionally some years we had snow.  There are a handful of Christmases that we weren't at home like we usually were.  This then lead me to think about the Christmases we spent in California visiting my brother and his first wife that we don't speak about in our family any more.  That then lead to me thinking about all the airplanes I had ridden in my lifetime because of those trips.

When I was younger, and I think this is still mostly true to today in some aspects, I was really afraid of heights.  Which some people find ironic since I'm pretty tall compared to others.  I didn't really care for airplane rides, they kind of freaked me out. Especially after 9/11.  That's why every time we went to the airport to board a plane to head to California you always saw me with a backpack with the essentials in it: coloring book, notebook, crayons, and usually a book to read.

Out of the handful of times I have ridden an airplane I've never slept on one, used the restroom on one, or even stood up on one.  For a child that couldn't sit still for long, I think plane rides were the only time I was some what subdued from my normal personality.

The last Christmas that we went to California for, our plane from L.A., if I recall correctly, took us to Cincinnati.  From Cincinnati we were put on commuter jet that took us to Wichita.  If you've never been on a commuter jet let me explain to you what it's like. They're small, compact and small. Did I mention small?  My parents were seated across the two foot isle from me, where I was sitting beside a man in his early thirties with his two kids in the seats in front of us.  Doesn't sound bad, right? I mean it wasn't a very long flight, but considering I was about seven or eight scared of heights and planes I was put onto a small compact plane.  It freaked me out.

And then, the man's little boy claimed he had to go to the bathroom. So naturally, with me being on the outside seat so I could still be near my parents, I had to stand up to let the man out of his seat to take his son to the back of the plane.  Doesn't really sound horrible, but I was scared to death to even unbuckle my seat belt let alone stand up to let him out and then stand back up to let him back in.

Lame, anti-climatic story I know, but I still remember those plane rides.

Link of the day: booksandquills is the YouTube channel of Sanne where she talks a lot about a variety of books.  I've always enjoyed watching her videos and she's kept my want to continue reading sparked with new books to add to my reading list.

days until ACT round 2: 6
days until I become an adult: 35
days until graduation: 167

BEDD 3: favorite NCIS quotes

After reading Kathy's favorite Doctor Who quotes on herblog, I decided I pick some of my favorite quotes out of my favorite show NCIS.  My family and I have been watching NCIS since it started, and before that we watched JAG which in several senses was really similar. There are so many good moments throughout the show and all of it's seasons, these are just a few out of the pile.

Season 8, Episode 10: "False Witness"

Gibbs: Facebook. that's the thing that some people...do stuff with?

Ducky: The term is social networking.

Season 8, Episode 8: "Enemies Foreign"

Gibbs: Officer Hadar. You almost made me spill my coffee.

Hadar: Americans...You can never just say hello.

Gibbs: How about shalom? Hello and good-bye.

Hadar: And peace, Agent Gibbs.

Gibbs: Not a lot of that when you're around.

Season 7, Episode 2: "Reunion"

McGee: What are you doing? I'm not the sidekick.

Tony: I'm the boss when Gibbs isn't here.

Gibbs: Gibbs is here.

Season 7, Episode 4 "Good Cop, Bad Cop"

Ziva: Look, I have learned many things from Gibbs, and one of those is that there is no such thing as an ex-marine.

Season 4, Episode 16: “Dead Man Walking”

Ziva: This is killing me. I feel like I know him.

Tony: Mossad?

Ziva: Maybe.

Tony: Internet dating?

Ziva: [picks up a paperclip] I will kill you 18 different ways with THIS paperclip!

Season 3, Episode 21: “Bloodbath”

Abby: I dated him last year and things just got a little out of hand.

Tony: Did I mention the restraining order?

Abby: Ok it was lot out of hand.

Gibbs: Why didn't you come to me, Abby?

Abby: Because, Gibbs, I wanted him restrained. Not beaten to a pulp with a baseball bat.

Link of the day: The 8th Horcrux is a wizard rock band from Kansas that I found over the summer when I was just hanging out on the interwebs on bandcamp. I'd definitely give them a look if you like wizard rock.

days until ACT round 2: 7

days until I become an adult: 36

days until graduation: 168