The other day I kind of mentioned something about making a decision of sorts, and I basically just left it at that, a cryptic and sort of worthless statement that explained nothing. It has to do with debate, and it was actually a really big decision I made, and I couldn't have done it without the strong support of my mom.
I dropped debate.
In other words, I'm saying I quit debate. Saying I "dropped" it (referring mainly to dropping the class) is the cowardly way of admitting that I did in fact quit debate.
WHY YOU QUIT?!
Gah, so many people have asked that. I genuinely love debate, but this season is/was different. I think the largest part of it is that it is senior year and I have a lot of things riding on these two semesters, I can't afford to muck up. And considering when I finally made the decision during the summer that I wasn't going to debate at a collegiate level, things went bad.
It wasn't that I wasn't applying myself and not working hard, because I was doing both. Between things already getting in the way with school and the fact that my partner wasn't in the debate class with me, it made working, or attempting to work on case extremely difficult. I was stressing out way too much. There was three days last week when I came home crying because of the situation.
Up until today, I haven't said much about dropping debate. I switched from debate to music history eighth hour on Friday, and no one really noticed until today. Sure the other advanced debaters are slightly upset that they lost someone from the team, but I know that at least one person for sure doesn't blame me considering the amount of extra hard work I have to do this fall during the show to work on that theatre activity scholarship.
So there you have it. You know about my decision now, and to be truthfully honest, since Friday I've been so much happier. I've started throwing about debate papers I sure as hell don't need, and deleting stuff off my laptop. In general, I'm a lot happier.
days until the fall musical: 47
days until I become an adult: 129
days until graduation: 263
steps taken today: 1,998+ I really didn't do much walking today. WEIRD.
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